I went through the day wishing I could sleep forever
to simply lay down
at the top of the hill
and be buried, entombed in the tundra.
a dramatic rise and fall
its seems I am the queen of winter, throned
only to be defenestrated by the subtle gesticulations of an old matriculate queen
still bristling from the fall.
my red hair was too obnoxious, my demeanor too nauseous, my relations with her corporation of plant lovers too much for me to deserve.
walking along the hill
all the places I once felt safe, at home, at peace
time seems to have reversed itself
this new reality of hissing spats and splattered disses
is cruel future that i wish to miss.
I fall into the snow.
the last seams that held my shoes together have given out
I attempt to rise, thinking of the kind voice that once gave me reason to rise before even the sun
but the vagus nerve that once innervated my sweet heart
has decided it is time to check out.
this snow is so comfortable
the cold of it is refreshing,
freezing my coal-hot tears in place as they gather at my throat
the ice pokes my skin like a million silicate needles
gentle pricking into me, feeding off my heart.
feast, beloved brethren, dance
Be held in the rigid joints of my arms
Take from me what you need. I am but a fallen flower, decayed
My voice rings no more, solely the echo remains.
My heart beats no more, just a cadaver’s trophy lies entombed in snow.